Oohwee, I allowed my feelings to flow yesterday, and I feel much lighter today. A reminder: if you let yourself really feel them, feelings last seconds to minutes (90sec on average). So even though it can feel ridiculously uncomfortable — and yesterday certainly was uncomfortable, as my body cycled through many different feelings over the course of the day — going ahead and feeling them is both the most satisfying and the most efficient way forward.*
Now I feel ready to get organized.
A reminder of my goal for this coming month:
—> Answer the question, “What book do I want to write?” so that I can then write the book with the full force of my enthusiasm.
My main methodology for myself over the coming month:
—> Butt in seat. I’ve given myself a deadline, and I’ve carved out the time on my calendar. A painter I met recently at a open studios event said, “I show up at my studio every day and play.” That’s what I’m doing: I’m showing up at the page (in my notebook or at my computer) every weekday, and I’m going to explore and play.
Today, as I have a number of coaching clients, my shorter butt-in-seat time resulted in this: a list of some of my favorite ideation and clarity-producing activities. I’ll engage in these over the coming days/weeks to narrow in on the book direction:
The Ideal Scene. You bring to mind the thing that you want to go well (e.g. having a clear direction for the book), and you vividly imagine it as though it’s already happened. You visualize out loud or freewrite on paper all of the details about why it went so well.
Dumping it all in a doc. I’ve already done a lot of miscellaneous ideation over the last few weeks, and I want to get it all in one doc. Back in college, this was my go-to for writing papers. I’d get all my notes in one word doc, then put them in an order, and then weave the essay together, culling and adding where necessary. It is very satisfying.
A list of questions. This is an easy and underrated way of starting to know what you don’t know. Prompt yourself with Who, What, When, Where, Why, and How. “When in doubt, get more information,” my mother has always said. Asking yourself questions can direct you toward what information you’re missing.
Green hatting red hatting. I learned this very simple brainstorming technique years ago from my neuroscientist brother, who I believe learned it from his former professor/colleague, David Eagleman. First, put on your green hat. Write down all your ideas, however crazy or mundane, with no censorship. Then, put on your red hat. Start by crossing off anything that is just obviously not the way forward, and consider the rest.
Listen to my inner knowing. Amidst all of this ideation and organization, I’m going to sit quietly, ask myself “What do I really want to do?”, and listen to my gut for the answer. I just did this today, and my gut said, “write something short and specific to founders”, immediately followed by a tinge of frustration and a slightly exasperated “I don’t know.” That response just tells me I’m not there yet, that I need to slow down, and that my gut needs more information.
Are any of these ideation practices sparking interest for you? How could you use one of them in your own life or work this week to expand your sense of possibility?
Love,
Kathleen
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*An important distinction on feeling your feelings, in case its helpful to you:
Feelings and behaviors are two very different things. Feeling your feelings does not mean taking your feelings out on others. Let’s take frustration as an example. Feeling your frustration on your own by freewriting or saying to yourself, “I’m frustrated! I’m so frustrated!” for about 90 seconds or stomping or hitting a pillow: yes, great. Telling a trusted someone (who has agreed to listen) about your frustration without blame or expectation: yes, great. Acting out your frustration at others: nope, not great.